As I've tried to teach my kids, making the wrong choice is very human of us. As is not accepting responsibility for that choice by saying “I just did it without thinking,” or “I just couldn’t help myself” or “I said it (or did it) in the heat of the moment.” The truth of the matter is, however, that we did think, and we did decide to do exactly as we did. The more often we follow that pattern, the easier it is to make the same, wrong choice, and the more difficult it becomes to break the habit.

Putting it another way, as all good Catholics know, it’s not up to us to forgive ourselves.

The habit can be broken. It’s a matter of admitting to ourselves that we made a choice — a wrong choice — and we could have, should have made the right one. This is the part that Adler calls “Spitting in the soup.” No matter how large the cauldron, if we spit in the soup it never tastes the same again; once we admit that our actions are the result of our own conscious decisions, our old excuse of “I did it without thinking” will never work again.

Once we accept that we are responsible for all the choices we make, it becomes eminently possible for us to begin making right choices.

 Now back to that earlier thought: if we look at the attributes of psycho-/sociopath behavior, we are struck by the fact that they are also the hallmarks of sin. I believe a strong argument could be made that psychopathic behavior is a direct outgrowth of Original Sin, and that even the smallest sins we commit against our fellow man can be said to be numbered among the consequences of Original Sin.

It’s not for us to excuse our sins, but to recognize them, acknowledge our responsibility for them, ask forgiveness, and, with God’s help, to stop committing them.

It’s really that simple. The Church and Adler both recognized that making psychology into a complicated mystery that only some specialists could understand was just one more way of making excuses for our own inherently sinful natures. The answer is simple, understandable, and doable.

No more excuses; if the shoe fits, admit that it’s your shoe . . . and do something about it!